25 weeks

I am 25 weeks pregnant tomorrow. I am sick with a head cold. Husband and i are celebrating our 1 year anniversary today. Technically it is day after tomorrow but that is a monday and we got married on a Saturday so we figured this would be the best way. Baby boy just kicked me. His kicks are getting stronger and stronger. It's a dream come true. I am actually starting to think about things like his birth and my birth plan. He has quite a few things already in his little nursery corner. I have a big ol belly. One that is so pronounced that strangers speak openly with me now about my pregnancy, "when are you due?", on a regular basis and offer to help me or smile my way and look on the belly. Some ask if i am having twins but as i have seen I am not really much bigger than most at my stage of pregnancy. We all come in different shapes and sizes and that is no less true when we are pregnant but I am measuring right on schedule by my doctors say and I tend to listen to her word first. I am VERY VERY happy. Life is beautiful. I hate being sick but I am grateful. My husband got a job. A good one with benefits. Life is on track. THANK YOU UNIVERSE!!! Now i go blow my nose.

Ripe with baby fruit, low on lettuce

I am getting bigger by the day it seems. Feeling more and more movement and more and more pregnant.

This weekend was challenging because I had a friend in town. He is kind of a party guy and I was put face to face with my own physical limitations during pregnancy. I felt kind of bad I couldn't show him a better time but a hot snap of 80 degree weather came and we had to walk everywhere. It was brutal. Plus I am tired by 10pm. Somehow I made it to midnight one night. I love him but I am glad he is gone because I really hated pushing myself but wants him to have fun.

My husband is still hard at work on the job trail. He at least got some work att the bike shop this weekend but all of the other work is over with. Done. He has two interviews and we are trying not to put all our eggs in one basket but those are literally the only basked we have right now. Till then the eggs are piling up (see:bills).

I posted my baby registry in hopes that we will get some help there. I imagine my inlaws and my aunt and grandma will help. I just hope we don't only get clothes. They are the most fun thing to buy but they also last te shortest amount of time. Baby will outgrow all these clothes in a year. Maybe I should make it so people can go in in big items together. I wonde if that's possible. Thankfully a friend with a baby is sending us her old carseat as a gift. I beer knew when I bought baby clothes for people but now I know that whilst they are cute and sweet in entire the other stuff is the way to go. Even baby blankets and toys are great cause they last so long.

My sons kicks are so strong now and gettin stronger. We are still going back and fourth between two names.

This is such a magical time, even with all f it's challenges. Thank you universe for bringing us this baby boy! I love him more than anything already.

My Son, OH HOW I LOVE THEE already

everyday since i found out about you has been a remarkable miraculous experience. i wanted you so badly. i dreamed of you day and night. now you are here, you are the size of a mango and just over half a pound. i can feel your sweet little kicks and aerobics. i promise you that i will do everything in my power to be the best mommy i can be. i will never put my needs or my life above yours. you are my sweet little dream come true.

i have started working on a nursery idea already. we have a one bedroom so technically it will be more of a wall and space area in our bedroom that a full on nursery but i still plan to do something special. Since Calvin and Hobbes has been at the forefront of my mind, and i am sure it was one of the many hints from the universe that i had a baby boy coming, not to mention i just ADORE them, i am working with my husband on a mural or wall painting with that theme in mind.  I am so excited. I also want to get him a stuffed tiger too.

Baby Boy

Somehow I just knew it! I am having a baby boy. I am so thrilled. I can't wait to meet my son. What a dream come true.

The 4 day countdown and trying to sane

Well in 4 days we will find out if our little miracle, our sweet little serendipitous baby, is a son or a daughter. I have a very strong feeling i am having a son. perhaps it is because i grew up with so many boy baby dolls, perhaps it is because so many have guessed that my baby's nub is a boys, perhaps it will be a fluke. Not sure but that is my feeling. That said, i LOVE baby girls so much and if this is not my daughter i do hope we have one some day. Stil, if i am meant to have two of a kind i will be thrilled. These will be my babies. And i pray that i can have more than one but no mater what i am grateful for this child. I love you baby, so much already. I wanted you so badly and I worked so hard and anguished so much to help make you a reality. In the end you were a surprise but i think it was my dilligent care of my body mind and soul, along with a lot of luck, that brought you to me.

In the trying to stay sane part, well that's due to hearing so many sad stories about women losing their babies or their own lives. One woman on my board, only 23, was killed in a snow mobiling accident recently. Another just found out her baby stopped growing at 16 weeks but was 23 weeks along when they found out. She had to be induced and say goodbye to her little girl. She had high BP and they were worried about neural tube defects due to bloodwork even prior to this but my god how awful. I hope she will be okay. My husband also had a coworker lose that baby at past 20 weeks. they terminated the pregnancy because of a heart defect. so sad. and so many others you hear about. So far my pregnancy has had no bleeding or complications. I always find the HB when i listen on my doppler (a god send once you get the hang of using it). In general i think our baby will be alright but these sad stories really rock you to the core. I just wish we could all have healthy babies.

I am gonna spend everyday enjoying my pregnancy and praying for the health and safety of my little one. I will take my vitamins and do my yoga and eat healthy and try to stay calm. i love you little son or daughter. I love you baby. I can't wait to meet you in 22 weeks (or whenever you decide to come out and play). You are the biggest blessing that my life has ever seen and that is saying a lot since i have seen so many. Thank you.

12 Week Ultrasound

sorry i have not written in ages. being pregnant combined with moving across the country has been more than i thought to handle. the good news is that we are all snug in oregon. we got a wonderful 1BR to start us out. it is in a wonderful walkable neighborhood and the weather has been beautiful.

on tuesday we went to our 12 week ultrasound and really got to see our baby. it was amazing. baby was moving around like crazy. started out face down but eventually turned and gave us great pictures. tomorrow i go public and sunday i will officially be out of my first trimester. we got the results from our NT scan and they were wonderful. 1 in 4000 chance of Downs (down from 1 in 200 for a 25 year old) and a 1 in 10,000 chance of trisomy 18.

i am sturggling to drink more water. i just already have to pee so often that it is not pleasant. but i love my new doctor. i have been dealing with an insurance mess that i hope is cleared up by the idiot rep soon. gonna be over 700 a month for my cobra but i only need it for 6 or 7 more months. yeesh.

anyway things feel blessed and surreal and amazing over here. i am already showing and loving this baby so much. everyone thinks i am having a boy. i always wanted a boy for many years. it would be wonderful but i really don't care either way and for some reason i have a sneaking suspicion i am having a little girl. maybe it's the fact that my husband is convinced it might be a boy and i always thought i wanted a boy but feel perhaps i am meant to mother a little girl. i just can't wait to meet this little girl or boy. we will be able to find out in about 4-8 weeks. so exciting!

Honeymoon miracle!

I am pregnant! One night in Bangkok ( enter song) in a bathtub without a sponge and I am pregnant! I will be 5 weeks tomorrow so it is still early but I am feeling very optimistic! My happiness and my bra cup runneth over!