Technically I was a quarter of the way through this pregnancy at 10 weeks and ill be halfway through next month at 20 but If you think about it those first four weeks ( or 3 and a half at least) you have no idea you're even pregnant! So in terms of the actual time I've been pregnant I'm just past that mark. I do feel lucky to know that I will truly be halfway through the wait at 20 weeks, give or take a week since I went over with my son and fully expect to go over with this baby girl as well. I'm not excited about that prospect but at least a bit more prepared and I will have my son to keep me occupied as well. I'm hoping to make that a time for enjoying our last days just the three of us (well four with our kitty).
Speaking of birth I am thinking a lot about that today. I truly wish I hadn't required induction with my son. I would love to avoid it this time of possible but I am also not keen on going over much more than a week or so this pregnancy. I'd rather get her out and know the placenta or fluid levels haven't been at a compromised. I'm also a lot less concerned about a natural birth. I'm convinced that my epidural is what helped me progress and I've heard multiple stories of women being denied epidural or not getting it and finally they opt for a c section because they aren't progressing and it's too painful and stressful for them and the baby. Older women are generally supposed to have a harder time going into labor on our own or progressing so it makes sense. I'm just praying for the most healthy birth I can have for both my daughter and myself. I also do not feel inclined to have a midwife or a water birth at all. My experience was that I didn't enjoy laboring in an upright position or tub as much as lying down. I was surprised by that too.
The fall season is really starting to happen here and I'm so excited. I'm enjoying spending time with my son on our walks. Last weekend we went apple picking and I made homemade apple sauce. I hope to make more. It's hard to believe that we have this season and one more then there will be a whole new person in our lives. Sometimes I think of it an get very nervous but mostly I am so excited and ready for the challenge. I'm so grateful to the universe for giving me this baby. Most likely my final pregnancy and baby, I am trying to enjoy it as much as I can. I am trying to enjoy the present moment. I know that a lot of changes await us. I will have less freedom or ability to get around like I can now. Learning to drive is going to be a huge goal once I get through the newborn days and our life starts to balance out. I'm even open to joining a daycare co op if I can find one nearby that will accept an unpotty trained toddler and a pregnant mommy. We shall see.
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